top of page

"You are not born for yourself but for the world."

Problem Page

"I am regularly bullied. What should I do?"

 

Rule Number 1:

 

You're better than them/him/her! Whoever is bullying you is doing it out of their own insecurity because they are actually afraid of what you have the capability to do.

 

If you really, and I mean REALLY want to deal with your problem there's only 2 ways. Ironically there is the easy way and the hard way. 

 

The EASY way: Talk to your parents and talk to a teacher.

 

What will probably happen?

 

Whoever's bullying you is now more aggravated and prone to bully you more, if real action isn't taken by staff or parents. You have to deal with the problem yourself if relying on others gains you nothing.

 

Result:

 

Little effort, high-risk: result -  it can sometimes work, however it may also backfire as do some typical easy solutions.

 

The HARD way:

 

This is the where you tackle this whole thing yourself, it'll be the most difficult thing you will have done in the last 5 years, but when you finish you will be the strongest person anybody knows both physically and mentally. No matter how you are being bullied there is one therapy that never fails if completed properly: gym.

 

I'm not talking about lifting some weights and your problems going away, I'm talking about you busting your behind every day, changing your lifestyle, not giving up for a year, and probably still having to put up with bullying the first 3-4 months.

 

If you dedicate time to yourself in the gym, you will start to burn fat/build muscle, which ever one you want to do, your self-esteem will improve and your mind will mentally begin to block out all the snarky comments people used to throw at you because when you see progress you begin to realize how much better you are than the people trying to bring you down.

 

All you have to do is NOT GIVE UP and remember why you started in the first place!

 

Every time you do that, you beat your only real enemy, yourself. If you can do that, you begin to believe you can do anything if you mentally put yourself to the task every day, to become the best you that YOU can be.

 

I GUARANTEE you, if you finish a year on a structured diet, workout routine to reach your goal, your confidence and outward appearance will be so stunning, the people who used to bully you willl be left speechless because you conquered them with both your mind and your body. You showed them what you are capable of, it's undisputable, and they will never lift a finger or toss a word at you again because they are literally scared of how strong you are as an individual. 

 

NOTE: If you achieve all of this just to do the same thing back to them, you're no better than they are.

 

How it'll end:

 

You'll believe you can do anything if you put your mind to it for the rest of your life, the people who used to try to bring you down can only look up at you in awe now, and you came out of the situation a million times better off than you were when it started in the first place. You will have the mind and body of a champion, no-one can tell you otherwise; and most importantly, you'll know it for the rest of your life.

 

Result: High effort, high-success rate, highest possible reward.  

 

All I can do is sit here behind a computer and tell you how to do this, you have to walk the road in front of you if you want to overcome your problem.

 

So stop reading this article and go do something about it!!!

 

Exam Stress - help me please...

"I have mock exams in January and I have found that the stress and pressure have become difficult to tackle. Do you have any advice on how to deal with exam stress?"

 

There's one major thing you need to consider when it comes to the amount of revision you do for your exams and the anxiety you experience as you get closer to them.

 

1. How hard are you working for it?

 

The first thing I want you to take away from this is, if you are truly doing everything you need in order to achieve the grade you want, then you shouldn't worry because it is guaranteed that if you put in the work, you will get the grade. If you only put in half the effort, then do not expect to get that A. This isn't to say that you should spend every waking hour of your life studying until you've memorised every letter in every textbook. This is to say that if you know you should be studying 3 to 4 hours a day during your free time, then do it! This may sound like a lot but if you split it up into eight 30-minute slots throughout a 16-hour day, I'm sure you will easily find the time. If you feel like you are shutting out your social life and it’s making it hard for you to concentrate on studying, seeing as  you want to be out doing something with your friends, try to juggle time in your revision schedule so you can still see them and get the work done. If you find that you can’t fit both in, then sit down and think really hard about your priorities. You are going to have all the time you want to spend with them once your exams are over, and believe me, you want to be relaxed in that period of time, knowing that you did everything you could and you gave it your all. You do not want to keep stressing after your exams, thinking that you could have done better. What I'm trying to, inevitably, say is that if you believe that you are working as hard as you should be, you have absolutely no reason to stress. However, if you know that you need to do more than you are currently doing, then you should do exactly that.

 

Further tips:

 

Structure your day!

Make sure you lay out a timetable, clearly indicating the time you want to dedicate to studying throughout the day. For example, although it’s the holidays, I want to be studying for a good 3 hours each day to get the grades I want. I will make a timetable, splitting up my study time for that day, outlining the subject and the content that I have to revise. This way, because I'm organised and I feel like I have everything under control, I have no need to stress. A structured and detailed timetable will also prevent you from procrastinating and guarantee that you will actually get things done when they need to be.

 

Ask for support!

If you feel like you need some support from your family, you should tell them. By doing this, it will show them that you are taking it seriously. Ask them to provide you with a more stress-free environment so you can take care of revision business or even ask them to test you using your quiz cards and/or revision notes to track your progress.

 

Remember, if you work for it, you'll get it. Good luck!

"I've been trying to ask a girl in my class out for a while now but I haven't had the courage to do so yet. Do you have any advice as to how I could ask her to be my Valentine?"

There are several things you have to keep in mind when asking a girl out.

 

I'll cover each of these points separately but here is a brief list:

 

  1. Confidence.

  2. Eye contact.

  3. Don't put her in an awkward position.

  4. Handling Rejection.

 

First of all, I would like to touch on point No.3 and warn you that everyone at some point in their life gets rejected (there are worse things than could happen), so don't worry, you will live to see another day.

 

  1. Approaching someone and asking them out is a lot about confidence. If you display confidence and give off a positive vibe, the other person will feel it and will be far more comfortable with the question. Let’s think about the difference between appearing confident and not. If a guy were to walk up to a girl all scared of being rejected, chances are he probably will be. This is due to the fact that, psychologically, females are not attracted to a man who presents himself as insecure and unconfident, lacking the determination to get what he wants. Your attitude HAS to be "I am confident, I know what I want, I want her to be my Valentine." This must be your state of mind. Give off confidence and a positive vibe through a smile, good body language and eye contact.

  2. The next biggest thing about talking to girls that you want to date is eye contact. I'll start off by saying that this is something you need to balance, not so much that you'll creep her out, and not so little that you project an indifferent aura. You will need to make eye contact at 2 points, before you talk to her and during your conversation. By making eye contact before talking to her, you are opening the conversation already. This is your chance to emit a positive vibe before you even approach her, giving her a confident look and a brief smile. Whilst talking to her, avoid diving into the question right away and engage in some small talk beforehand about her Valentine’s Day plans and such. Encourage yourself to maintain eye contact around 90% of the time, which will reinforce all that you say, as well as show her that you are confident by being able to maintain eye contact and talk to her. Then, you can pop the question whenever you feel is right. Just remember, confidence is important and maintain that eye contact.

  3. Asking a girl out in front of her friends can drastically change her answer because she will be conscious of how her friends will perceive her response. Instead, try asking her when she is by herself or when there are less people around. Should you follow all my advice, you will most probably succeed. However, in reality, things like this are never certain. In the end, the man who wins did so because he tried, and if he failed, he tried again until he succeeded.

  4. Now, if this does happen, no worries! It happens to everyone, usually, more than once. There are plenty more girls out there, believe me. However, of course, you may feel embarrassed by the situation, but don't be. She may be interested in someone else and that is fine. Plus, in the end, you proved yourself that you had the courage to walk up to her and ask her out. Be proud of that! So, hold your head high and try again another time (probably best to choose someone else). It’s up to you how you handle it but my suggestion is to get back up and try again another day.

 

Good luck!

"We are not born for ourselves but for the world."

bottom of page